For me, this seems like the time to finally stop pumping and donating breast milk to local families. In the last three months, I've pumped over 3300 ounces (or about 26 gallons) and donated it to 4 different families - helping them to reach their goals of providing a diet of exclusively or mostly breast milk, rather than commercial infant formula. I'm so very pleased to have been able to do this for them but as I seriously contemplated stopping this process, I realized that some of my dedication to pumping was tied into avoiding a more complete end to this whole surrogacy journey.
It has been 4 years, 5 months, 2 weeks and 1 day since I've not been in some stage of the reproductive process. I've either been pregnant, breastfeeding, preparing for pregnancy or pumping. That is a long time to be focused on such a narrow area of who I am. I think that makes it hard to have a broader view and move forward ~ but that is something I must do. And there is no time like the present.
I have been working hard to lose the "baby weight" that has hung around since my first pregnancy over 9 years ago. At this moment, I have about 20 pounds to go and I'm confident I can do it. I've finished 5 weeks of a 9 week "couch to 5k" program on my treadmill. I'm very proud of myself for the dedication I've given to the activity as I usually fall off after a week. Also, during my last workout, I ran for over 20 straight minutes. I've NEVER been able to do that. NEVER. Not even as a teenager.
I'm really looking forward to getting closer to my fitness and health goals... and still really hopeful that another surrogacy is in my future. But I know I have ALL of 2014 to dedicate to myself and my goals. And that's exactly what I intend to do!